By the Sword


by Dennis M. Hammes










SCRAWLMARK PUBLISHING


Moorhead, Minnesota

The FISHHOOK Group







-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-







BY THE SWORD SCRAWLMARK PUBLISHING Moorhead, Minnesota The FISHHOOK Group -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- By the Sword Copyright 1995, 1996, (C)1997 by FISHHOOK and Dennis M. Hammes All rights reserved. No part of this book, whether text or graphics, may be reproduced to hardcopy by any means including mechanical, photocopy, electronic data storage and retrieval whether analog or digital, or electronic broadcast, without prior written permission from the publisher. This book, ONLY IN ITS ENTIRETY (all poems, graphics, and attendant files), may be copied for distribution or inspection via diskette, modem, Bulletin Board Service, Online Service, or InterNet, provided that no charge (beyond that for materials and handling) is made for such distribution. Scrawlmark Catalog #DMHSWORD.ZIP ISBN: LCC Cat. Nr.: Scrawlmark Publishing 1016 South Third Street Moorhead, Minnesota 56560-3355 -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- for James Kenneth Larson, d. 1975 We only persecute the ones it's safe to persecute. -- Anthony Boucher -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- Table of Contents 1. To J, M, PDQ, SOB, ETC 2. Amendments II 3. Armistice 4. Dry Snapping 5. Tank 6. Occupation 7. War Relics 8. Little Big Mouth 9. Widow's Walk 10. Dominion 11. Two Swords 12. P.S. 137 13. Horeb 14. Motion Denied 15. On the Green 16. Holy Saturday 17. Eternal Father 18. Night Watch 19. Class Dismissed 20. Nostriolet 21. Gargoyle 22. Wayside 23. Odysseus in Ithaca 24. Graveyard 25. Grief 26. Dead On 27. Asylum 28. "Equal Justice" Is Redundant 29. Minnesota 30. Dr. Kevorkian's Children 31. River 32. Victim 33. Foiled Again 34. If Pigs Had Wings... 35. Flameout 36. Ice Water 37. Spirit 38. Vet's Club 39. Ace 40. Ghost 41. Passage 42. On the Maintenance of Purpose 43. September Song 44. Song 45. Solstice 46. Anachronism 47. Animula 48. Concerto for Blunt Instruments 49. We Regret 50. In Country 51. Cat Fight 52. Book Worm 53. I Doubt It 54. Phenomenon 55. "Cold" War 56. Seeing 57. Sartre Suite 58. Thanatopsis 59. Turnabout 60. Memorial 61. You, Ralph Emerson 62. Owed on a Clone 63. Reflections on Fishhook xix 64. Troll 65. The Difference 66. 172 67. P.S. 31 68. Your Honor, 69. TV Guide 70. Moritake 71. A Conjugation 72. Election Tuesday 73. Purpose 74. Holy Communion 75. Our Town 76. Making Up 77. Mystery 78. Fire /Or/ Ice? 79. Incident In Da Nang 80. Dedication 81. Definition 82. Fruit 83. Planning Commission 84. Question 85. Biology Film 86. Bomb Shelter 87. Justice 88. Pastor 89. Sample 90. Strategy 91. Survival 92 The Graduate 93. Capitol 94. O. J., 1996 95. Oops 96. Pity 97. Proletariat 98. Stoppage 99. Suffragette 100. Whuffo -=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- 1 To J, M, PDQ, SOB, ETC. Author from the bank returning, Spoiler of the printed page, Here is cash that asks not earning: Write you in a carnal rage. Sex is come, so farewell lover, Welcome broken words and all: While the boyfriend rolls her over, Your thesaurus hangs in hall. Tell the gamester growl above her; Write the raving anapest; Type the tattle to discover What it's like to be a breast; Tell no plot, nor any story; Let your manuscript drip beer; Never, never, have a quarry; Let no single thought appear. Now no more of finger-biting: Sex is safe from fall to spring Curses set aside for writing "How-To"s for that midnight fling. Rest you, brain, and rust you, pencil; Swede and printer, keep your pay; Author, sit you down and stencil Out the bouncing night all day. * with mumble apologies to A. E. Housman 2 Amendments to the Constitution: II The nitro-pungent whiff of oiled-gold cartridges Sealed, long and cool, away from the Garand Dissolves this panelled wall to fields where partridges Fell from the long voice in my father's hand. He raised his hand, and left for numbered ridges. They sent his things. He's healed of blisters and The nitro-pungent whiff of oiled-gold cartridges, Sealed, long and cool, away from the Garand -- But left ballistics law, and other drudges, That we will green a state paid on demand, And smell again, when children cozen judges, The nitro-pungent whiff of oiled-gold cartridges, Sealed long and cool away from the Garand. ____________ /Garand/: U.S.Rifle, caliber .30, M-1. A big, chunky weapon, more suited to stopping the beef than shooting the bull. 3 Armistice Seven stroppy logs of oak Were propped along the wrought-iron rail c That rings the hearth. Each puffed smoke Though some scratched lumps or spat, and spoke Of evenings on the trail. Their cookhouse camaraderie Was joined by feet (two large, two smaller). Sweet rolls and two cups of tea Mellowed the bitters poured for me And chased scotch for my caller. Steel and wood now weight the wall Their outline wonce made lighter, And slippers scuff the darkened hall Since the captain came to call With praises for my fighter. 4 Dry Snapping Allow the special alloy of the Special, Double action double checked and hollow, To alloy the eye, rediscipline the forearm, Last the special reflex to the bloodline, But not yet spit the pine knots from the wall. Practice while the bloodline is still social, If not the species' sense of being special : Straight out from the hollow of the gut, Let it find the knot and barely snicker. Do all of this until you get the point. Hard and hollow on the wooded wall, The knot is the bare hollow of the gut : To be less knotted in the wooded hollow, To slide less when the sliding foot Presses to the ground the snickering wood, That last the last sound one of you will hear Is a dry snapping. 5 Tank Does it matter, now, what kind of cannon smeared Its blooded cargo, or who flicked its string? The bronze-fisted arm accuses skyward, But for death (its? theirs?), or our poor practicing? We shattered pellets on the fearsome thing Exhibited by the elders at Grafenw”hr, To try the shiny bore too small for bear; And, failing that, we shuttered it on film, A flicker sent to bash the unabashed With our bright, flickering moment. It was dumb; I mean the beast, mute, pictured king of the smashed Hill still -- well, there it is. But freshly gashed -- The one we shot at with a cub's false lust Was one that stained the whole earth with its rust. 6 Occupation Though we'd signed treaties, some were yet Destroying papers, scrounging a set Of underwear, Or pointing pictures. None was a Jew; Still, we'd had to have a few To walk on air. Deprived of their he-manly toys, Boys went back to being boys, Store clerks, and robbers, While we watched so that /Bundes-/boards Beat no dictums into swords : The peacetime jobbers. After the bombs and bullet scars, Twenty years rebuilt the bars In downtown Munich; A split arch prods the unafraid With victory, and that methods made It largely Punic, /"Delenda est."/ The always prize : The plain applause of net-sheathed thighs. In reborn Bonn The browning streams turned into beer, /Fasching/ went off with a ragged cheer, And drink went on. Before we sat, I and this German Had antipathy in common -- Nothing other. But beer-talk plucked our eyes half out, And the new view was more than doubt Though less than brother. Smooth whiskey played a Scottish skirl As each approved the other's girl And the /Pie'ta/, Though we'd seen neither (took our word); And, as sublime became absurd, Misquoted /Go"the/. He showed his tattoo with a grin, And I mine : these approved us men, With hides of leather; At /wiedersehen/, our apocrypha, The eagle and the swastika, Were shaken together. My ears distort all sound. Indeed, The whole earth howls on my right side, Providing data; I watch /schnapps/ dissolve my watch To wool, as world becomes a blotch Of bright errata. 7 War Relics He rolls a highball, holds it on his heel, Then wraps a kneebolt up behind his head. The untouched frosh flesh drops its eyes to squeal The clown-elect, a derelict half steel Who props his tubes, then tubes himself for bed, And wonders why Jud Frye is only dead. 8 Little Big Mouth Then you, whose cheeks engulf the threatened chair, Slack muscles long ignored, your belly bare, Drew out your jackknife, quartered the last pear To burn its guts, and sniffed that it's not fair To foreign folk whose fathers upped and died So I could eat. Well. You can play outside. Because I'm here, unlicked, and somewhat snide, They get your vote. Now, what does that decide? We fired because they fired, and they because We grow pears. Now of all economic laws, "/Si vis pacem, para bellum/"s flaws Are many, but the worst is little jaws Whose sucking noises drive all thinking out. You and the pear are here : eschewing clout Won't change who kept the loot, who got to pout. And you don't speak the tongue you cry about. 9 Widow's Walk Those eyes pierce mine while passing by my heart, That saw what was for twenty years. Then this. Erased the features are familiar As senile wrinkles may relate the youth, But that lithe lad I laid has laid a man In this salt mariner; the rope of war And twenty years squeeze off our present time And leave me but the nominy of him To whom I clove my troth, and that sword oath That told him from my hearth. Sun and the moon Burn twenty years his friends beneath the tide While that erased the strand to write the strand, Removing sand to leave a little sand As I wove. How shall I have husband him Whose loom has kept the strand of his own story? 10 Dominion And death is no dominion : never over Those who swallowed green Aegean fire Past the gasped judgment or long terror That shoulders straining at the callused oar, Long servitude to pain, and thanks for swill Were better than this genesis of self Into the sea's quick voice, less quickly stilled; Nor these whose blood made ribbons on the Ruhr That minutes past trailed ribbons from a roar; Nor hiding at a heavy hull, held out The voice of water driven by a can Past timidness or welcome for this union, This bang, met with a whimper or a shout, An end at least to fear if not to doubt. For seeps through spring to singing in the birch And through the thrush to animate the cat This sea; and here the hare's precocious twitch Or that opossum's long blind grab for half It sees when shuttered eyes get round to vision, The sea comes home, and articles of self Again assemble into constitution. 11 Two Swords /Basho^:/ Liveliest blade, /katana/'s gem Is passed precisely through the stem, And watch the blossoms drop like blood In pseudotemporary flood, They stain the ground, and scent the rain, And fly back to the branch again. /Luke:/ But since, to bother things in bloom, A larva's lung is little room, About the iris I will go For blossoms unconsumed by snow With one light sword and pocket fire But not the let of those I hire. 12 P.S. 137 By the Laughing Water we sat down And added tears when we remembered deeds : And our guitars hung from the plum's new thorn While they that poured our milk demanded moods And warmed their coffee with our fathers' words. They piled our corpses as they prodded song, Yet shall I sing although the land be wrong. If I forget our Concord, let my hand Forget the cleverness it taught the pen, My thumb abhor the stone-taught steel, and sand Stop tongue to palate while the living ten Abandon me to juries of children And I forget all of your words I saw If I prefer their corn to living law. And law remember dogs of dogs in streets Who stoned our fellows with our marketplace And smeared our pages with their melting sweets : Thou child of Congress, these the law embrace That turning in the season of their place Rejoice to serve you with your very own, And sing who sting your children under stone. 13 Horeb /From Mt. Hor the view is one of magnificent sameness . . . -- Robert Frost/ Upon this unslaked slate a man could write All that he would, except this weight of light Where space so presses particles of stone There rose this rock, protruding like a bone. Here ends the ease of Goshen and the Greeks, The rice, the wine, the rouge on watered cheeks; The ram of Egypt, the Atlantic Fault, All space and the lunar haul come here to halt. The rock like brambles and the light like flame Everywhere assaults the eye the same, And in this flaming crush my sojourn saw The all-beginning and the end of law. The earth still shrugs this place from time to time, As though to shake things up as much as I'm; Then let sun shine else megaton rocks crush, Tumble and thrust, and break this awful hush: The light holds this, as in a photograph; Overexposed, as instant as a laugh And more eternal than a rock can be, For light was first of all that came to be. And one man dwell on what the round world lack, Rock has more voice than that the tall rock crack, And one man dwell on what to make his own, He learns the heavy penitence of stone, And I should dwell this lordly house forever, But for that the living rock wakes never Because the pressure of the falling sky Keeps weightless rock asleep. I wonder why... For rock this bright /is/ weightless in the sun And rises with the whirling of the dun (Sir Isaac measured with a pendulum) As though on fire in a woodless sum. But light is not the whole that I confront: Here stones assembled into covenant, Begot that generation-prompted awe That children reassembled into law. The rock is weightless. Pressure of the air Has cleft it down to pieces we can bear And carry off to temples struck from this With all their weight and their antithesis. Let not the bone speak back but speak along That holds to heart the space around the song, For time has stitched what time will yet unfrock, And bone will add its litter to the rock... A kind of rock assembles into bones That press the air to congress into tones; The random wind blows sand to blanket shape And yodel at the ear attempts to ape Its other lives... Here is the start of time Where life can find a base to start its climb, That will not yield to pressures from the wind Nor sway with friends to alter or rescind. No frightful future and no aching loss, For here there is no past to crawl across, Only the present hour, and that amassed As if the stones themselves could pray and fast; And here I am and here I shall remain Attempting time the ear cannot arraign Between the fire and rock the heart's air tossed And heated past the sun to pentecost To understand one covenant alone As changing as the statement of this stone. 14 Motion Denied Some jokes made once when time was young Are seconded by any tongue, And some are stale their second time Whether written, played, or sung. You're not the first to try our climb Up from the unlaughing lime To sort the petrine polyglot And leave your digits for your rime Like scrimshaw in the coffee pot, Your only art a Rohrschach blot Repeating nothing but your youth Uniquely seasoned with your snot. Nor will your saging of old sooth Brick once the pyramid of truth; Consider that your average kitten Will not repeat the sabertooth. Your littleness just isn't fitten Whether sung or played or written, But still you think that you can clot Off whatever you have bitten, Like knowledge was a wound: you swat Two words to see just what you wot; That is the oldest joke of all. Being smarter, it has not Named "poem," what is only scrawl, Nor "bravery," what's stupid gall: Nor stay behind nor run away Nor stick your finger up at all The lines and adlibs in the play, Still here you are and here you stay To live to try another day; To live to try another day. 15 On the Green I've played the fields at Eton With sweet Spring to my knees, Without my Queen to sweeten But by thought, such stout and cheese, And here she matches pitch for Pitch, and slice for slice, with me, So what have you to bitch for, Pilot, where the Spanish be? The wind is lee, the yards are set The stays are at their strain, And it is forty minutes yet The Thames begins to drain. So quit your idle clatter, Pilot; pour you some Pinot, And all the pins will scatter From the way you've held your throw. 16 Holy Saturday /Winter kept us warm./ -- T.S. Eliot I. /The Burial of the Dead/ A clap of time, and thunder ends in pellets, Puddle of flesh that stains the whole effect. Was all this mess necessity? We got the point, Old Man, we got the point; Already the flies convene to crawl the story. /Nunei de mei, to tria tauta/ : Field, fold, and feeling; of these three The greatest of these is feeling, and of that A feeling for the limit of the feeling, A functioning shit-detector. Old Man, making Dust of ten number-two pencils and a morning, Dust of dust, ashes of ashes, hope of love, /to tria tauta/, why should I give a damn That accident bespatters foreign place? You doomed creators of oblivion, Trying to hide your strychnine in old lace, Why bluepencil with an ounce of lead What an ounce of lead will find again? A mystic paragraph to try to follow, Parenthesis with one end blown away, Your participles dangling from the wall? Send not to know : your residence in me Is quite as mortgaged as was in yourself. Too much to write was what it was : the rage That you would never finish out your page Before the fourdrinier of flowing water Tore off the coming-out of your most daughter, This bint lingo. Old Man, what of it? The speech of children never goes from scream Quite far enough to dinner with a dream In one old man. At any time. So shove it. The marvel of a dancing bear and speech Is not that it may modulate from screech Into Baryzhnikovs of vocal reach, But that it pull its pucker from a peach But long enough to thank-you. Not to teach. Get your head out of your anal phase Long enough to praise. II. /A Game of Chess/ Who is that on the other side of you You have not quite as much of in yourself? Lady, three white pawns stand around a bishop In which a nimble infant wants a passion. In this the evening of our nimble passion Whom must we suspect before the cockcrow? By my nose, you bishop hath the look, And /fienchettos/ him with men-at-arms That close his corner also from yourself While sitting out the game in splendid fashion Staring a single line. His keep is locked; His knight is barefoot and without a guard; And they the while must stay their place or else The whole fraud fall. Salute the clever boy, How he invites the infant king to hide Behind the walls and arms of holy mother! Whatever the game come, he has made his place; Crown and command capitulate, His Grace Will never let an egg upset his face! Four corners of the world, and four broad rooks (Removed they can be, but they cannot spall Nor ever sprout our ivy from a cornice) To bound the lines of things. I hadn't thought A wall could be so supple or so shifty. And we'll infest it all, begging your pardon My most milady, with the what we will. But how shall we, whose harps are stopped with willow Sing our Zion in an alien game Although the game demands of us a song The long clang of the sword gone wrong? O my Lady, what have all these rules Done unto us so lately? Why have we No hope of heaven but to do again The pieces from the box? And why have we No hope of god to cover our mistakes But only to begin the game again Fresh from the crib? Behold the Lamb of God. Methinks that bishop's nothing but a pawn And where that leaves the king is hard to fathom : Into the fray and have us at a song Never the harp stopped ever or for long For always some damned fool will find to sing Some 'vantage of the board that swells the rout No matter that the pieces go to box And never to repeat the thing again But in the opening. Behold the Lamb. I feel a virgin, and my blade is worn To but a foil in your unblushing service! The play's the thing, and all our zero sum Is all the man conserves by /fienchetto/. He sits a pawn, promoted to a bishop, For having learned to look along a line And all our game be certain not to block it Or else he's back to being but a pawn Without the pawn's promotion or advance. He will not dance the dance there is to dance. /Moriture saluamus te./ But who's that on the other side of midnight, And this the longest midnight of the year? Who is that bishop with the frightened leer? And must we shuttle in the same old ways, And start again and come to zero sum And all the pieces come back from the box. When will this round of resurrection cease? III. /The Fire Sermon/ The brook is wetted broad beyond its banks, Benign in the crash of glaciers into pine, And what is not to pine weep into prairie, Sipped in the stalk by timid feet and tiny, Flown in the veins of insects. What does not fly Field, fold, or feeling, folderols of fledgelings, Ends it here, weighs stasis, light like steel, And objects whom the water hones to nothing. Those these in whom the river tenders time Stay this middle stream, pretending term, Their world leak down the ocean sewer, Dreams' grave and the world's one tear. By our water we sit down and weep. Well, Old Man, if we must haul your ashes Haul we will. But not on younger foreheads. Sprinkled on the steel head of the stream For trout to tout, and scramble of the salmon To squirt and die and trickle to the Gulf Where all things settle, scattered on the bed Where bitterness may turn in time to limestone : Steal softly, stream, lest that old kraken wake On whom we trip unheeding in our green And pesty dawn, that alkaline rock rise And leach the sap out from another season. * * * Though all the law trip on the younger tongue, There is no reason we should choke on ashes, Nor bow to babes with kingdoms on their hair, The unearned silver shrined amid their teeth. The lilies breathe their sugar from the air To root in silence what the next shall bear To his uncomely belly; and the law Out-stare no decisis of comely youth To have its meals on time because it saw. To the Fall of water we are no more bound Than water is. The river is among the stronger gods, A god whose grip is never broken on The dance or ashes of the lesser poems; Silver at dawn and steel by afternoon, Against whom every battle's always won To lose the war : the earth her gigolo, Leaving of itself at every touch To be it left in turn at every turn : And then she to Poseidon once again Who give away, revirgin in the rain, This svelte snowbunny of the great divide Revealed of all except the pending ride. And that, Old Man, is not a store for ashes, Shooting rapids in a bit of rubber, Though we who worship at her fickle stuff Come always in the very dead of winter, And find the place unsatisfactory; Only to leave, over hollow centuries, Four notes from Siegfried, while the clarinet Eddies through the /G”tterd„mmerung/. That is no country for old men. To lose itself, a laziness of lawyers, White bodies naked in the low, damp ground, Squirming through a lesser vegetation, Scared of spiders and in awe of ants, And rolling up the armor of its pants. IV. /Death By Water/ The mice step often and the deer step deep. Sweet stream lie softly while I wend my song Or scuttling things will steal us in our sleep : Our shore dissolves for all our way is long. Severs the stream of time, this bag of body, And makes now bastard husbanded descent, And such adventure every sip a toddy, And melts to mayflies all the were we went. Shall skin slap skin, the sea slap rowdy sea To wake apart by but this bag of me, Abraded and afraid, become the god Who leaks in at a sip. And then leaks out. Couldst let that be a fate to pout about? V. /What the Thunder Said/ Hold tight and let your friend downhill; One snow is not the winter of a man. The water in the snow is water still And twenty weeks will wet the whippoorwill Into a faultless strut. The fellow can Make up an egg from half an egg and bran, What, he worry? the virus of an act Surrounded by its food's as good as fact. What senses do we lack we cannot see The course of children with a steel-shod sled? I giggle, Salieri, that I'm me To hear the parts abroad from Middle C -- And that the Count accounts you better fed. A sack of slush through which there passes bread And years enough; but then? You can't at least Confess enough to shock a common priest. "Put out the light and then put out the light." As well confess you had designed Suzanna. The sins we give are but the sorry sight To hide behind our worship of the night That overcomes us not. Confess /mens sana/ You, a-Sinai, know to leave the manna Vapor in the sun while you seek sin Enough your sulking fellows let you in. We heard a janissary bang a sty And I thought him a generation sweeter; /Allegro!/ which is he and which is I Parading this concerto that you try? September stems obese, bright amanita; Here, morel hides a birch in sleeping cheetah. These are the resurrection and the life, Shaped by the synapse and the butter knife. A quaver in the air : the veil is split And looser clothes on lesser men are found Leaning close for countenance, their spit Made empty by the quicklimed earth I quit, Their sense made no less noisy by their sound. Now you must spill yourself to claim your pound, For art is no release, but brings the grin To all of those who'd have the tunes again . . . Otherwise, music causes nothing. 17 Eternal Father If one galled up and rammed, all Arthur mad The little grins behind the belted bullets; For my suckling sake strained long at shapes That would or would not answer gleam from gloom With jellied gas to kiss the bubbled flesh; He is my father, for these fathers made The world their gate before the senses scattered; Who got this wheat their blood are more my blood And I their get, my garden by their guard, Than goat-glad fluid in the groping dark. 18 Night Watch Three o'clock. My keys. My beeper. Rounds Allow their sleep to occupants and grounds. Now cave of basement : pillar, pulse, and core. The salty breath of gypsum from the floor. New pipes and water heaters. Hods. The tracks Of plaster surgeons. In a footing, cracks. I feel a heartbeat stutter into shale To apprehend the rending of the veil : Three stories settling in the strata's mouth, Slowly following the sabre-tooth. Why should the time-pressed sediment erase That close on midwatch, suddenly your face Appears above your sandwich-cutting board, Meticulously settling this hoard Of care for my least tastebud into place About the corners of my writing case? 19 Class Dismissed Our celebrating men of war Reverberate from stiller rows Who don't know. What they're fighting for Will settle into homely lore Whose teachers let no word that knows Our celebrating men of war. Anon this blackball takes the floor And argument creates two foes Who don't know what they're fighting for, But each recruits a solid core. No speeches anybody knows Are celebrating men of war: Dear John comes home to try to score Despite the sass and local blows Who don't know what they're fighting for, While governments that they restore, Whose flags now flap above the crows, Are celebrating men of war Who don't know what they're fighting for. 20 Nostriolet If thumbing noses, god is all That thumbs his nose. And nose is god. The same thing happens in the /salle/ When weapon meets the chest of clod: The Profs can't figure, in the brawl Just which is Berkeley, which is quad Where tree or man had his great Fall That thumbs his nose and noses god If thumbing knows his god is all. 21 Gargoyle I am the Sundays; package of eight decades Sticky with the sauces of the sword, Being read to by a little girl Armed from church. She has no language in her any look, But reads to me what she has often learned In the order she has often learned it. In her the word unsaid will never speak, Commit no age. Her friends, her fashions, chosen by her friends, The one because they think that they have heard her; The one because she thinks that she has heard it; Having no face. Her memory of face Fades with her resentment that face Should make design what she presumes in fits, As fast forgets. Her eyes are guiltless /how should she have guile who never sought the sticks beside the path the /punji/ advertised unfit for travel/ And she intones her news sincerely; baths Have washed off all the gook she found revolting When being sound and one of limb and eye, I bequeathed her, voting the small salt Out of others to clear her way. Now she bids this house against her betters With words so printed that she bid a house Unembarrassed at being caught wanting A penny for the guy. And she believes she carries as I left it This that carried, these the rooms that dressed her, Dress her now with all she needs to be. Four o'clock. I am handed coffee That has no want nor any want of want, No notion even that the thought of craving Was something fashioned to accuse young girls Of causing men to cause the fall of men, No hint of habit, wanting any thought That giving is for giving; taking for taking; Each time only the voices of dolls Propel the chore, Soundless, fearless, satisfying nothing. /there was a son i was to have a son he did not come back from that other skirmish/ I did not come back when I came to this. But she puts on my lap my recompense Because it cannot walk and she can walk; Because she cannot want and it can want; Because it became somewhat my face. 22 Wayside The roads are lettered with these names And every place between is gray; Their honor was to furnish flames That light their ruins for our play, But still their tumbled honor shames The little slogans that we spray : And other shrines receive the games And every place between is gray, The roads are lettered with these names. 23 Odysseus in Ithaca More rare than fingers fashioned by the sword Or callused by the cursing of their tools Is love that chafes to bursting on its words To supple at itself, its own salt jewel Make fit like leather form it never felt Though that smooth skin wear but the primal fault. The having none with whom to share the fault Has had more singers fall upon the sword Than on the lyre to say what beauty felt In breathing man; then do not fault the tools For having made a sandbox of a jewel When wandering wonders trickle out of words. You do not know me. Twenty years of words Callused to cursive pattern for the fault Of wasting twenty years on that fouled jewel And all my men who thought to take the sword Was but to take up residence as tools Have robbed my voice and rubbed my curls to felt, And what Victory recall what the stone felt Before it rubbed the alphabet and words Of prig Pygmalion's cocky box of tools? To make our dwelling on an ancient fault Of being none until the careful sword Found and defended here and there a jewel Was in itself enough to wreak a jewel, But fast forgot what its creation felt As boys are left forgotten by the sword. This is why we leave the sharpened words, But is it theirs, the lawyers', or your fault That you confound the product and the tools? You knew the fitting out, unbeaten tools, While these are tired of Greece, nor wear the jewel By which we loved us, but these boys' same fault Is dumb of how our Menelaus felt When fit forgot him for some fitting words; Nothing I bring, but the unbeaten sword. The sword is the most general of tools And not my words unfaced our wedding jewel, But not since Aulis have I felt such fault. 24 Graveyard I had today a letter from the Legion, Expressing, I supposed, my country's thanks, But addressed from a subscription mailing list And left to who was housed behind the fence. They asked for money to convince the troops That freedom doesn't let them burn their flag. And it is thirty years since I took flag Across the pond against a foreign legion That had for justice plenty of its troops But not, as it would seem, enough of thanks. (A culture that does nothing for defense Does not stay long on any mailing list.) Now on a granite wall's another list Beneath a rather ordinary flag That flies beside those crosses like a fence To mark the graves of quite another legion To whom are also owed eternal thanks. The crosses too are something still like troops : Sharpen all the tops to paratroops, Thin them so the footmen can't enlist, And tip them into caltrops to the tanks. (Serve some time for vandalism.) Flag These boys new purpose, they a silent legion Who can't be said to ever sit the fence And call it double mileage for defense, This vandalism of our silent troops Is no worse than to little that gray legion By carving up what's left of why enlist. And let the some watch samples of the flag Until they see who dares first at our thanks And who like all the rest will spend their thanks Intimidated into undefense Because our flag can never lick their flag Save theirs be in like case, and low on troops. Don't save the names for any mailing list Though those who lick at boots will number legion. But number, too, a legion that gives thanks Nor posts a list of numbers for defence For never will you see their troops to flag. 25 Grief Why should we give our water to the dead Who after all have lost the fight with breath? They are ourselves, who are, and break, our bread, And we in turn will process through a death, And back to life, and chew the world again, The dance of being making place of place As any flame says, falsely, "I maintain" And current being shouts a single face. You who grew so far into my life Will grow no more, but fade with other past, All presents now without you like a knife That cuts you from each day, an overcast, For I have lost a portion of my brain Until that day I find you once again. 26 Dead On This is the day my mother told about, This was the morning that I woke up dead. Perhaps the problem lay in getting up With half my stuff from yesterday still on As though I were the making of a legend, A small refrain in multistanzaed song. While having made, but never being, song, And never singing save to sing /about/ (Because that is the stuff that is a legend), I found that legend's made about the dead By those who think enough to carry on Whatever indigestion they threw up. I have enough of it just getting up, Let alone the breaking into song That I am trying to end my sentence on: I've not the vaguest what I am about, But keep on trying, lest I wake up dead Though never to dissolve into a legend. Now, I would like to sing about a legend, But don't know any that were not made up Because a working man had wakened dead And all his fellows wanted him in song Because it gave them less to think about: A preposition they could end him on. Instead, his song has carried on and on With just enough of fact to keep the legend One more thing they had to think about, And how the man was not quite all made up By that sweet power that lives in every song And sounds quite loud enough to wake the dead. Of course, what wakes does not look all that dead, But has not learned as yet to be dead on Until he learns the love in every song And how it separates the fact from legend, Until enough of love at last gets up The work he always had to be about. And comes, when he knows all about the dead, A day that he wakes up to happen on Enough of legend to become a song. 27 Asylum He shuffles in the hall from meal to meal (You hear him coming: he is so polite Not to intrude surprise); we give his aisle And he gives ours, and we sit down to eat. All sauce in his life is dinner sauce. He speaks to pass the salt and thank the pepper. He has no thought that he is any less. The weather is a prince. We are the pauper: The doctors took his vitals: all is well. His paperwork complete, his tests and grades Tell all there ever need be of his tale; All normalcy is in three pinks, two reds. A shuffle like the sand wrung in the glass And plastic ticking in the shrunken jaw, No hint of self makes him admit to loss. A cigarette? A game of cribbage? "Nah." There are no flights of language that we made When he arrived; his thought is nice, and even Quite acceptable: all are agreed He got great benefit from our brief haven. I ask him how his former self can cope (Not in those words) with psychotropic charm; He is a bit resentful of my carp. "I'm going home," he says; "I'm going home." 28 "Equal Justice" Is Redundant The gavel wraps the case up for the files But we must go on living with the fact The perp has perped, while he lies back and whiles In creature ease. Will he not reenact? For punishment is not, that lays its straps On crime's hard times or easy-stolen pelf; "Uncommon" is but what we have let lapse, Nor ever cruel, for crime named it itself In taking from another man quite all It quickly wanted, when it wanted, and Not seeing it were kind or usual And certainly not caring it were banned: We're civilised: obey the law crime cried And help ourselves to stripes across its hide. 29 Minnesota The pike consume the little perch, The perch consume the chubs, The chubs eat while the minnows lurch And nibble at my nubs. Not fishermen alone adore The summit of this /schtick/, And, once home, make it model for The body politick. 30 Dr. Kevorkian's Children Trapped in decrepitude by modern gods Whose worship by some ancient-sounding men Is ignorant that "age" in those ephods Meant /thirty-seven years/ (another ten To toothless wisdom: others chewed the food For those who chewed the thought and said the deed): The hurting old seek rest, but all their brood Want still that age eternally precede Their little ignorance and moral sloth, And make it crime to go and crime to help, And, that being not enough, appoint the cloth To blackmail soul into another whelp, Who scorn our souls. It's /that/, that makes us loath And that, alone, that makes us seek to live Beyond our worth as well as past our growth, Voting our pay, who've nothing left to give. We have no age beyond our birth and death, No time beyond our waking and their sleep, No voice beyond the current rasping breath, And no least value past whatever's cheap. But soul's a verb, ignited by the life And grown by ghosts from dotty to doyen; Let have their right: let have the mercy knife Who have no purpose but to start again. 31 River Running off at the mouth, replaced by rain, The river cleans a place of history, Sucking the very rock of blood and pain And leaving the new tenants to be free Of what is past and better left undone Again. By rain, the land is free of guilt, And does not grunt with "did" and "didn't," one With all it ever takes to grow its quilt Of forest, field, and towns beneath the moon, Each trying to outdo the other, gain Being logged in plats and subdivisions, soon To come to crowded cemeteries, rain. And never does the river heed to this: Field, forest, brewery are all the same, Carried to the ocean with a kiss That means as much as this same harlot's blame. And once in ocean, it turns back to rain To etch the rock of happenings again. 32 Victim You whom fate made poor before your birth And robbed thrice more before your youth was out Have scratched at pennies to rebuild your worth, But there is nothing that can still the doubt That all the rest won't get you by the way, That doing is worth doing, seeing, seeing, For these won't mend, and might at best dismay The broken toy that tried for human being. What is it that is permanently soiled Because of your encounter? Is it soul? Or is the smiling universe despoiled, And you too helpless now to make it whole? Still soars the sun and lovers point the moon, And flowers are for who will stoop to lust, And you must know, as you slink past your noon, Not one of these knows care: it's we who must. Nor can we let abuse to spoil the rest, Not any more than death may spoil the life; Each day and all its beauty is caressed By man alone, who takes the world to wife. There is no beauty without attitude, A disposition to be beautiful That world reflects, or otherwise is crude: Plants and not flowers, fact not fanciful, Only what is, and none of what can be. Locked in the vision of what was, and is No longer, save in prison of that fantasy That mind keeps fresh, but will not let you quiz, Now you lay you down to sleep and kiss That old excuse for daring not to dare; We've all a coward in us, but sweet this Is freedom from the fight, without compare. But fear of men is not a social skill, As fear of fists is not a martial art, And wisdom isn't several decades' swill All perfectly recalled, and so kept tart, For swill won't dance, but must be kept to shape With constant petting from a doting mind In order that it keep the heart agape And blinded with what it's supposed to find. And yet belligerence is still a start, Acknowledging world's overtures with spite: Protection proves that you protect a heart, But will not give the thing without a fight. It proves that you protect a dream as well, Regardless what the social misconstrue, And so we wait, the other side of hell, For that one flash of thought, when you come true. 33 Foiled Again Now I have little to forget Of decades told upon the keys: The world can't tell, and Juliet, Who looks at them, whom they abet To mind and love, and each agrees, Now I have little to forget, That I will go to pay my debt With all the rest: Eumenides The world can't tell, and Juliet Won't see, remove their /pointes d'arrˆt/ And I will sneeze the final sneeze. Now I have little to forget Despite the sermons of /belles-lettres/ That self consists in fantasies The world can't tell, and Juliet Refuses, but the slim /fleuret/ Is certain of my next reprise. Now I have little to forget The world can't tell, and Juliet. 34 And If Pigs Had Wings, We'd All Need Steel Umbrellas Much of what I love I've never found -- Your long blond hair collapsed around a cello As you coax spruce into its softest sound; Something besides your carrots in lime jello; A one-inch group at fifty yards, offhand; A hue more sunstruck than that mute chrome yellow; Mo' money from my wallet on demand; A tiny, one-ton truck that needs no gas; A ninety-mile strikeball, underhand; A woman whose discourse wants any sass; A poem I didn't write, but came to me; No sight at all of what will come to pass; And yet I love the world for what I see, For it's by that, that I have come to be. 35 Flameout I click my lighter shut; the flame goes dark, But lingers in the butt without a doubt; Next time, the flame's the same: a little spark Sleeps in the stone until it is struck out. These blooms succumb to tulip droop and I Put up the camera, for they speak of age That were the heart of spring: a year's supply Of life is fully spent on one week's rage. Yet from a pattern in the bulb this flame Aplombs next year that withered on this day, Petal and sepal burn, and fill my frame The same as those I shot to put away. The quick blood stopped and memory collapsed, Its RNA now suitable for food Not food for thought, the art of living lapsed Into the absence of all attitude: But life springs from the seed, and mind from life, And memory recalls itself in sight, Practice, and thought, and takes itself to wife The same as always was before the night It slept too long, a blank when it awoke, Nor knew itself, nor even how to start, Until it found a little trail of smoke That was inspired to life by this hot heart. We know our darkness, we, the human race, And curse the light. But anyway we go, Our voices changed and wearing a strange face, To stand beneath the stars and strive to know. 36 Ice Water On a line by A. MacLeish "After such knowledge, what forgiveness?" How Shall any be absolved the crime of knowing? It's seeing sets a man apart, and now There's nothing to be done until our going To start again in ignorance and then To strive with all to not know Galileo, Pauling, Keats, the lilac, or the STEN -- And this is work, /de diligende Deo/. We lie with mammon to remain the same And friendly with the ignorance of birth; For every animus, a fact's to blame, And this makes worthless every little worth. Leave off this knowing, fill your lives with those Who do the same thing at the same time, they Who kneel and sit and speak as one, suppose Their copy books exhaust the living day: Make friends with them, for none can serve a god Who fills a life with lilacs and the bees (Color and mechanism a shock to plod), And bigger things more blasphemous than these: The Pratt and Whitney turbine's perfect curves, The air-oiled spoil of airfoils that defy Whatever attitude that disconserves The study of them other than by sky, A giant Case with twenty bottoms brown, Sprung from a common thought and not a king; The curse falls short, for first of any down Is always lilac, rising every spring. Put down that book! for it will set your heart To progress all the way from /do/ to /do/: In ignorance, you'll never be apart Nor ever see how far we have to go. 37 Spirit The dust receives us but it cannot keep: As nature templates and the spirit clings, Our phoenix rises from the printed peep. We have no coffin and we know no deep Who slip to surface through the roots of things: The dust receives us, but it cannot keep. We wake to mothers that we wake to sleep, Until we form our old imaginings: Our phoenix rises from the printed peep. Who smells a flower knows the end of sleep As likeness throbs to what the lilac sings: The dust receives us, but it cannot keep. From every treatise in a tumbled heap Comes all that memory, as though on strings: Our phoenix rises from the printed peep. Part obvious, the rest hid far too deep, The new soul slumbers like the two Pekings: The dust receives us, but it cannot keep; Our phoenix rises from the printed peep. 38 Vet's Club In Homer, I recall three thousand years -- Not bellies gaping to the chirping birds, Nor friends split to the chin after our beers, Nor yet the straddle trench half full of turds, But just the heave of Ajax' famous spear And other things that make a man a vet: The fun we had with women (one most dear) -- The other times, in Homer, I forget. 39 Ace Fear is the key, for fear alone can keep The neck so rubbered that the seeking guns Have no least place to hide among the sheep That chew the sky, or in the sun that stuns The air-cleaned sight. It is the fear makes sharp The straining vision and the shaking hand That firm the plane into a ringing harp, Aluminum and aim, life's allemande That ends in death for one, for one a mark Beside the cockpit, bragging of brief time That two had put aside the creeping dark To challenge hell, perhaps go home to mime The dance with soaring hands (that lately shook Around the stick, but not once any Hun Got quite so close enough to have a look): That chore accomplished, time to tap the tun. The work of missiles is another thing From ground or air an eye within my eye Seeking my warmth to spread across the spring: Nothing to shoot and nowhere else to hie, You roll her guts out so the tail fins creak To stuff the nostrils of the stinking SAM Up her own ass; it works some half the week Or grab the loops and take it on the lam. Above all that's to fly above your blame Or any didoes that the math contrive, For fear that keeps another from the game Keeps me alive. 40 Ghost How often must I wake up blank, With all to learn and birth to thank; With everything I ever learned A thing of wind since I adjourned? I once knew scrimshaw, how to flint, And how to boil the peppermint; One day I learned the shades of light, How gravity keeps moons up tight; I learned that little billiard ball, The atom, isn't that at all, But is, instead, a standing wave -- I came so far from my old cave! But suddenly, my diaper's full, I can't stand up against the pull, And if forgetting weren't enough I've lost I ever knew the stuff! But universe bends to my crib With unadulterated bib, And if my mood is ever grim, A Face that Loves my every whim Appears above my fantasy To find it out and give it me: I greet each offer with critique To keep my ignorance unique. Now, I could keep that lonely heart, Let petulance keep me apart From all I've done and all I've been And labor under my chagrin That death will end my being or Will let my "bounded spirit" soar, Or I could choose the company Of all who build my memory And all who work beyond their youth To leave their birth, become the truth, And set the stuff to music so That others try a chance to grow, Including that especial case When I don't wake behind my face With nothing for the trade-in brain But crawling through it all again. But learning is a faster art When I consent to leave a part To show me all my life's results, And warn the errors and the faults, And not just those that happen by But all those people's, that were I. Of course, the observation frames Insist I went by different names And sometimes spoke a different tongue, But so I did when I was young: It took three decades just to speak, Millenia to learn critique, And millions just to take a fire And put it in a box. Desire Takes that much longer to confine That molecules may realign In thought that is the same each time Or different just as much as I'm From year to year (and life to life), The difference a largish knife To petulance in man or men That owns the coming citizen As if it were a common pimp And levies fines unless he limp And grow no more than common folk And only live their little joke. But I will sing, and sing aloud That any growing boy be proud To blow a reed and pluck a string, And learn with little arguing To take the test-tube and the pen And be again what I have been. 41 Passage The famous eagle will not fly, But wants his mom to bring his meat, So though his wings are long and dry, He screams and squabbles for the treat. He looks abroad on foreign lands But greets the world with hungry yawn Until his mother understands And kicks his ass to sky and gone. 42 On the Maintenance of Purpose It was a winter's day in late July; The Kitty huddled underneath my covers, Not wanting to go out, not knowing why; Even indoors, it was no do day for lovers: The wind slipped through the northern window wall, Or so it seemed, for weather clamped my face, The clouds so low the smallest stood so tall That he could brag of thoughts beyond his place, And did. Nor could I gainsay what he bragged For weather had me walking under worms, My purpose lost, my shit-detector gagged, My loftiest of thoughts remaining germs. But some jerk bombs Atlanta, and the games Go on despite two dead, an hundred hurt; No single human falters; no one blames Atlanta, the Olympics. They assert The gold in every life by such a play. So let us gain by such a show of guts. And failure or device? TWA Would like to know; the FBI goes nuts Trying to find 800 in the Sound, For something spread it here to there, and all 209 aboard are still not found. Is it tragedy or is it gall That tore the thing apart? We would know why. Meanwhile we will buy our tickets, stress, Secure that It will take the other guy. Given that sense of purpose, can I less Who only suffer from a bad-air day, Continue in the doldrums of a sinus? Far be it from me ever to say That it's my own damned fault I came up minus. 43 September Song The smell of winter through the fading trees Bespeaks November, eager for the end; The birds assemble in their twos and threes 'Til long black pipes of them wait dividend In going south, their Spring not yet prepared Earth's other end. There is no hint of snow Nor even frost to see the trees all bared, But skin knows wind, and bids the summer go That winter have its little joke at last, And, having done, beget the singing time When life learns life and growing is so fast We can forget the creeping of the lime. 44 Song The words fit into place like bricks of sod, A pressure here, and there a little gap; But they will grow together, thanks to god, And make a whole, and ever-living, trap The Water of the mind will find a map To other ground and places unbegun, And make the universe its gingersnap, Ruler of but itself and serf to none. To breathe into these words a human voice Gives life to both, as two perform one kiss; One breathes the present and the other, choice That singing live again, but hear, too, this: The world is full of servile little men Who want you to become their words again. 45 Solstice The longest midnight came, and sat about, And, finding it unwelcome, turned and went And took the old year with it like a lout His only girl. It's not that I resent Long nights: the light is cheap, and coffee ample; Plenty of lines will bear attention, here; The Kitties want another can to sample; The furnace lets me sit with frost so near. But I'm holed up behind a grunting truck, Confined to office or to living room Like any felon who would change his luck, And this was it. Although we but assume Our orbit turned around (without a 'scope), Millenia of work by those who know Have come to almanacs, so here comes hope Dragging a new year with it, dos-a-dos. A little change between the shoulders knows We've one cold snap to sit through, then the thaw Permits some shopping and a visit, slows The frenzied furnace and the frantic claw That climbs the drapes to look for summer, then Blames me for changing what's behind the door But still wants /out/. They'll find their summer when The other solstice gets here. Not before. But this one is a vigil, as it was When skin-clad Celts would sit among the clock Of Stonehenge, waiting for the dawn, because It /should/, they knew, have smidgened one tick-tock Toward south and summer. Well, Welsh winters let A man to do such if he had a mind, But this is Minnesota, where they bet Their spit will snap before what I've designed Comes half to pass. And so I sit inside And trust my other clock to let me know That midnight and the season took a ride, While I have tea at thirty-five below. 46 Anachronism I should sit and listen to the wind Make music of the draft that fronts my stove, But I would know this weather, be frost-skinned Just long enough to do some job, say, rove The open supermarket for my kill Of instant cash and cigarettes and milk, And walk it home slung at my back, the chill Reminding me that man and all his ilk Had once to live like this without the down- Filled jacket or the insulated boots, Or plows that roved about the town Before I ventured out, all in cahoots With voters and their taxes (even mine!). But I would live with nature as my tutor, Ringed by woods, to learn their each design, As long as there was juice for my computer. 47 Animula Without the program, man's a piece of meat That butts his head throughout the simplest jobs; His ruff stands up: he growls what he would greet For having never left the baobabs. His careful sight inserts a /better/ world Between the fact and he, and then his hand Will not fit out the hole; his fist is furled And will not loose the specter he has spanned To gain his freedom, frightful as it is For it will make him be all he can love For self-esteem and worth. Instead, his quiz Is "Lord, Lord, Lord" and "All of the Above." His jealousy of love and its results, Especially knowing he could do the same, But magnifies his Lord, so all his faults Loom small enough to fully shift the blame And slit the goat or nail Him to a cross: So right to have an outlet for his fault, And none have faults like ganders on the sauce; For him, God's Body always wanted salt. His virtue is the sin he was too shy To get around to tasting in the dark; His values are all things he cannot try; His love for life is but to disembark. He has no self but what another lets, Nor any purpose but to be on time; By trying nothing, he has no regrets And knows no height, so doesn't have to climb. And so he plots in concert to harass Whatever shows him up, and looms a threat As dead things seem to move in rippled glass, But, to his thrusts, he is the /pointe d'arrˆt/. His teachers fed him nothing but the Truth As they would have it, while his peers made sure They were the only judgment of his youth, While television saw his thought was pure; And now his touch turns everything to shit Because his vision shuns all ugly facts: He's diligent to study every nit, But takes their outlines from the lens' cracks. He does not care: he has his law, his priest; He has his place within his honeycomb; He has a little flour, a little yeast; But has a little soul, that will go home. 48 Concerto for Blunt Instruments These shreds of fear and tatters of idea I drag to your shy welcome of my pen, Areek from fright, the onomatopoeia Of teeth recalling bullets thrown at men For pearls at pork, for being citizen, No mind how high, begin as pediborn As those who measure cleverness in scorn. To take Communion so substantially The substance of it breaks upon the thought, The fast from knowledge broken on fallacy, My ignorance has left me so distraught I learned far more than others said I ought And ducked their fists to learn it, or else took Them on the nose on playground, class, and book. There being no immediate solution And knowing vengeance is a mortal blow, I bode my time: I'd not seek absolution From some vague sin I do not even know But hold it to my heart, and let it grow To its full veniality of breath Before I dicker at the screen with death. Description wronged (for we describe in part And dare to taste what's guarded by a word), There's more to this slow heaven and your heart Than ever dreamed of breath in your choked herd And more to heaven than any god abjured By saying so, this place between the waters Precious both to us and to our daughters. But let the question put on common raps, The arms as sinewed swear to want the deed For wanting the conveyance and the craps' Right roll, asserting chickenfeed All that such a little question need. Behold at hilts the arm become the word Mere tides ago but voice in skull's red curd. Then bastards who will not stand out to fight But hide behind opinion that the law Is what opinion pines the law to right, Assert truth be the little that they saw And no such thing as any williwaw. Then neither taste nor sumer cumen in, Utility of olive drowns in gin To render doping copalatinate If not so copasetic as its harm. It does not need your succour of that hate To short my word by shortening my arm So that your chosen win without your charm, Nor so unedged by what you strop as love I might as well fight with an empty glove. Who hated age must hate themselves in age But for habitual contempt, that leaves boys young Well past their primes, just capable of rage But never of the songs their folks have sung, In love with their own mouth with their own tongue While nothing makes its way inside the skull For that their little mouths are always full. How shall I call a friend that hates my love, Who is accused by bandages of wounds I never mentioned, proving that he shove Though no complaint escapes the easy bounds Of song on song whose only sight resounds Of lips made supple by the purse of love And thumbs made clever by the fencing glove? What lover hates the stained and hand-shaped glove That in the hand's own solemn language sings The judgment of the sword, that keeps alive All other languages, no matter brings All world the basest base of copyings: Admit the devil without the devil his duel, Admit to all the world the lazy fool. None but the gods love. Children suck the grace That pours from love in ample polyglot, Then swear to kill a love so a boys' race Not see among them what a pity's not, For pity's all that little boys have got, And wallows in the ignorance and murk And needs another's supple love to work. Now I was Hamlet at the age of nuns And stayed the hamlet past the surge of blood And so want Hamlet in my keep and puns That I must arm them all. But if the bud, Then him I would revenge is still a flood As surging with my blood as I with his, Whose living has no want of any biz From me. The living live in want of it, But shall not have it for their little pleas: A substitute shines brightly as a teat Until a teat be by for me to tease And make itself quite happy to reprise, And not want any other pay. 'Til then Young boys and girls are level now with men, Giving and getting in various sham coin, Each "sovereign" by another sovereign served And serving in his turn, each to enjoin That none of all may rise to the deserved, Nor shackle accident to be conserved: And each and each, they fit so carefully That smelly albatross, "equality." 49 We Regret... What is so red as tulips in the snow, So white as summer's moon above the night, So blue's the sky between where cloudlets go? So red, so white, so blue's your loving light. Blue shadows peeped beneath your strutting breasts; Red are the lips that gobbled at his skin; White is the soul that leaped to his requests And arched to any pleasure with a grin. Red is the blood that watered freedom's debt After it quit your so-white purity; Blue is the truth, demanded /"a-vous-pretes?"/ After it made a boy a memory. So red, so white, so blue must Country be That would be loved by women such as thee. 50 In Country We sort of spray the bushes with our shot. To take the time to aim is to be hit. To name the target is to cool what's hot. Besides, kids have grenades and other shit. And so we spray the bushes with our shot. It's called "reconnaisance by fire" and kills Two birds with just a couple dozen stones Apiece. Or mostly. And these jungle hills Are live with punji stakes and boobies' bones Who left the trail. We took back the kills That stayed right on it. But you never do Step off the trail, or you won't go home, One way or the other. You're overdue And Charlie is too fast on his own loam For you to go where Charlie wants you to. And so we do "reconnaisance by fire," And sort of spray the bushes with our shot. We don't walk on the lookout for a wire, Be seeing Charlie where the fella's not, And being /his/ "reconnaisance by fire." We follow that to take a "body count." We don't know what we hit until we see. And usually, we fudge on the amount To justify reconnaisance by spree. And that's the reason for a "body count." The juggling of numbers is a skill. The smaller size of bullet lets us carry Thirteen hundred for a single kill, Get our Service medals, go and marry. Yeah. Join the Army. Learn a real skill. 51 Cat Fight The Kitty bumps my hand, presents his rump For anything that I might do to it, Kiss or kill, and gives a little bump, His knowledge certain that we will aquit Ourselves as always, that the game of choice Does not include the things that harm a cat Because they harm the doer worse. Rejoice That this is so, that most men know it, that The few who don't, incompetent to hurt, But spend harm on themselves, so much afraid Of what they will not learn they will not flirt With what can well destroy as it has made: For all we take, we can as easy dish Defending any world that we may wish. 52 Book Worm A worm just doesn't get how gross it is, The bullet phiz, all centered on the mouth, The writhing when he puts on his showbiz For hook or robin, up from the warm south For one more season's meals. And hooks impale The convoluted gut, the tiny heart, The sex that takes up half the shrinking flail, And offer all to some insipid Sartre Who will not know a value 'til it's done, And so will never learn the way of hooks. And hooks are such, it only takes but one. The same is often true of certain books, And grosser than the worm is books' abuse That make and justify some lame excuse. 53 I Doubt It The cat can tell what's afterbirth, what Weenie, And eats but one, and so her race survives; And nature puts that data in the genie, But what about the hundred billion tries? How many things that would have been a cat Ate their own young, abolishing the line? How long did nature wait for something that Contributed her kits to her design? If it can be design, that wastes so much To see what works by seeing if it does, Inventing life without the Midas touch, And entertaining novelty because. But entertain she does, with all that lives, And life finds her quite entertaining, too, Investigating just to see what gives, Collecting just to see what will accrue. Some men, alone, adventure by design: May get the basics quite by accident, But fit the parts to parts, and realign The lot until they show their own cement, But nature is a bitch, and strews about Whatever lives for minutes or for years, Leaving it to swim despite a drought Or take a step despite its little fears. We are the Grand Experiment in doubt. The fish can fear, the goose can love, the ape Convey its mind in language and in clout, But only man stands with his mouth agape While all the others run or burrow home. He stands and questions that the tiger means To have a little snack, and so this gnome Just stares at him until the beast unscenes. He watches swallows looping in the dusk Doubting his father's ground-bound rules of thumb; He thinks the air, he thinks him in a husk, And thinks their wings stretched out in spruce and gum. But the real trick's to doubt what we believe Until we take its measure with a fact, Nor quit for losing "faith" may make us grieve For what we never had and could not act. For centuries, we learned to fear the Pope Because his bullies crushed our major joints; But then we learned to doubt instead of hope, The what it /really/ was, so far anoints A man to "office" from among his peers It turns him vain, and mean, and rather rotten, And so in love with votes, and why two jeers Explode "authority" on rocks of cotton. For centuries, we learned the earth was slope Despite the curve that Archimedes found, 'Til Galileo told him off the Pope, And now we can fall all the way around. Now if our gentle women learned to doubt Their perfect little children's perfect lives They'd keep the blood and throw the bastard out, And we poor men might then regain our wives, But all we get are gangs of little brats Who know that their perfection is of course, Who wreak their fantasies until all that's Left over's teaching ethics to a horse. Now, even horses bow them to the whip (Which is /not/ done until the flesh is torn), But here we have the juvenile lip That's god's own gospel for that it was born. A lash or two would fix the infant mind Upon the job at hand, right through the skin; If we would doubt a bit, I know we'd find God sent these brats to /try/ us -- not to win. 54 Phenomenon The phenomenal growth of a Kitty Is much like the growth of a city, But phenomenal growth is no answer: Mere phenomenal growth is just cancer. It must either submit to control And not violate its parole, Or the growth will get quite out of hand And the being be one single gland Whose function takes over the rest 'Til the heart cannot beat in the breast, Or the wheat grow beneath katydids, Or the city survive its own kids. Now, those who would pander the mind With a pap of a singular kind, Will all swell to peculiar shapes, Overfeeding one lonely synapse. For the mind's a phenomenal feat, But it grows on whatever it eat: If you treat it to feast at the dump It'll be nothing more than a lump. 55 "Cold" War We waited for assaults that never came. Not quite. Three times they massed along the border; Thrice we lived among the woods; the blame Flew thick as bullets. We, now long the warder Of others' freedoms, worried for our own; Our loss was sergeants, thinking up a chore For hands that only waited to the bone: We'd count their tanks, then counted them some more; Outnumbered five to one, we dug our holes, Chose positions for our major guns, Sighted our rifles and emplaced our souls To lose for certain, but to buy four suns. The threats of the long Cold War have abated. They never came, and just because we waited. 56 Seeing (after A. MacLeish) I saw a blacksnake on the floor A few steps past the darkened door. It leaped at me. As if with that, The long black thing became a cat. What changed? The snake? There was no snake. The cat was always black. And flake. There was a doorway; there was me; And when I saw, then I could be. 57 Sartre Suite The tiniest of leaves break from the bud: Maple in miniature, /bonsai/ of the oak, Now breeding life out of the valley mud With not a thought for carpentry or smoke. The tiniest of kittens' urge to live Pummels its mom in minutes for a deal And learns to exercise alternative, Perhaps to eat, perhaps to cop a feel. And then comes man, whose fear to make a choice Begets "philosophy" that voids its "terms," Apologising for its very voice, But treating man the way he treats his germs. The growth of Nature's vegetable stuff Is existentialism quite enough. 58 Thanatopsis I, too, have my dead. The first when I was nine. They left my father's head Uncovered by the pine. It was too early, all The weight of the undone That's rolled into one ball By any dying one: There was living, death Without a /billet-doux/, And I was short of breath With everything to do. My best friend killed himself For things he could not be: Well-married, father, elf, And free of misery. A nephew then was shot, The victim of youth crime. They said that he was not To take any more time. An aunt died in her prime: Her careful house was sold. Her husband takes the time To fish, and to be old. And then a sister went, "Expected," of a tumor. "Expecting" what is sent Is not the best of humor. And so I've watched the clock, Or have since I was nine, Expecting the next shock To lay me in the pine, And so I try to fill Each hour with all creation And just as much of will As law will let, and nation, But everywhere I dast 'Sthat ticking of that cop That, whether slow or fast Will, soon enough, just stop. Mere death is a relief, Not any thing to fear. Unless it comes a thief. So, off with that brassiere! 59 Turnabout Responsibility for choice Hounds every freedom, shrills the voice Of those who want the choices free Of knowledge of what is to be. Oh, listen to the squeaking Sartre Who would not learn a single art That told what choice was coming to; Excused himself with "nothing knew." Camus called every choice "absurd"; We should apply it to his word And judge the boy by what he said Was going on in his own head. Plato said we could not know A real thing, the so-and-so: The dictum certainly bespots Every one of Plato's thoughts. Augustine wrote that God Told Him The First and Last in paradigm. But how did St. Augustine know It was a God who told him so? What test is there by which a sense Is certain that it represents A god, a devil, or a rose Unless it also rub the nose? I do not think Augustine rubbed Quite anything he said he dubbed; Nor did Muhammad, Moses, John, Commit that crucial /`agion/. And as for Plato's spite of forms, They're nothing more than thinking norms, The selfsame things that Plato used To say there were none. How confused. John Calvin stated all of Law And /mea culpa/ when he "saw" That there was no such thing as choice: All things were Given by the Voice That Johnny, he alone, could hear As if no other had an ear. It's not strange that John C. conceived it, Rather that the folk /believed/ it. Responsibility for mind But renders most completely blind By choice, excuses fully planned, Like ostriches embracing sand, So we can say "we didn't know" When "Fate" crows, "Well, I told you so," As if our ignorance excused The way our lives are thus abused. 60 Memorial So we have come upon this blinding wall Made of tombstone, too many names to face. "We died for your mistake," they softly call And each heart's trumpet stutters at the place. The names say "we remember." And the flowers. But here are those who never touched a wife And those who left their wives with empty dowers, Thank you to the politics, the knife: But the only thing they're standing for Instead of something gained, or victory, Is all the ways a boy can die in war, And each one stupid as a death can be. The wall appears too high to vault, too sound To blast on through, my country. /Go around/. 61 You, Ralph Emerson I see the lilac: beauty looms in me That had no thought of what it was, before: A thing created just because I see? Well, no: lilac exists, and something more: An adding to myself, a certainty Of good, the wish to freeze this frame in time To have it always its first shock to me Of infinite addition to what I'm. The lilac isn't beauty, isn't good, But just some cellular material That rises when the world is right for wood And can, some days in June, well take us all. One thing, alone, makes lilac so gentil: The fair and good can live alone in me. 62 Owed on a Clone Oh, happy flakes of rock, that nightly die And resurrect as fast, you show me how I need not whine about my little why But will awake, and soon, with world enow, As crickets quicken knowing how to bitch Their little lives that cannot find an air, And I will waken knowing how to shit, You come alive each morning, knowing which To do all you did yesterday, and where Each thing was put, and what to do with it. And, /res augusta domi/, I shall learn Each thing in time, that makes me as I was, And go beyond the things that you must spurn But not for any choice, or just because I've fifteen senses to your paltry five, But that I /wish/ to learn and you do not. Nor is this due to any sort of spite: It's simply that you are not quite alive Though you digest the arcane polyglot In seconds, that it took me years to write. Twice I have transplanted your old heart And thrice your brain, that knows to go about My business only, for your only part, And never did you show the least of doubt For what I did, or what your job was then; Your only crime, you suddenly knew more Than I about the whole complex affair. You do my every what, and do it when; You do not mind the nature of the chore: Forever shall I love and you be fair. Forever shall I love and you be fair When I rebuild you, that you fill my son With all of me that public schools won't dare, Who'll build him into something of a Hun; For you, in building him, quite rebuild me, Without the guilt for errors never made; Without the sickly ache of every loss. And what you make is still as quite as free To learn yet more, or else, still me remade: Be careful of this salad that you toss. And let him take the pen or keyboard now, He'll learn his letters, and how they are torn By singing to the deaf, the low of brow, And singing of emotion not yet born, For kharma is a sentence without fault, But writing is a sentence self-imposed; The love of language seldom knows reward Beyond two words that, rubbed as one, ooze salt. But, thanks to you, before his chapter's closed He'll see his own son take him well aboard. Meanwhile I build a program word by word The reader will digest in seven days: It's been two decades and most of a third Since I found out what laws the mind obeys, And laws they are, the kind you cannot break Any more than thrown mud will fall /up/ From off the face. Near thirty years I wrote, A single program all my living stake, My resurrection all my loving-cup As music anchors any man afloat, But more than music is the thinking mind That gets its start in how to build itself Not from its fellows, but from its own kind That it can find on almost any shelf. They are his parents, who ignite his thought With things beyond the pretty violet, That teach him law, that teach him how to dare, That teach beyond his hunger what he ought, As long's one thing alone receives his /"nyet":/ "Abort, Retry, Ignore" the whole affair. Man builds on man, that built him on the ground, But children build on what they want to be More true than anything that they have found, The air of such thought being wholly free, And blown apart by any little breeze. Air does not build a house, nor blow one down As the wolf found from sampling at pigs; The world is not maintained by such as these, Nor added to. Nor any infant frown Stand in the way where man puts down his digs. Now, this computer is a living book, The publication of a living man That will digest whatever he can cook And add his generations to his span. They will be more than he, he does it right, And is not one of those who need the small To mimic stature; if he fills their cup Before they drink themselves with every fight He'll tell them early and he'll tell them all, And give his children his own best leg up. 63 Reflections on Fishhook [ XIX ] The hammer-headed cumulus are lilac to their tops, And shrug their way to eastward after watering the crops (This Minnesota weather is the best when it just stops). It's hard to keep in mind when such a sunset goes on view That nuclear explosion has produced this dainty hue Conjointly with the fronts that make tornadoes barge on through, But so it is. The world is sometimes vicious to the core, But we were all bred by it and don't notice any more, Not even when our statesmen breed the viciousness of war. The killing and the maiming happen, yes, but not to me; For I am far more worried by your little frown, you see, And by the dandelions that beset my property. So when a sunset happens, why, I welcome the ado: I think of how I'm going to try to tell the clouds to you, And skip the rest because I know I'm pretty vicious, too. 64 Troll The traffic sounds go grumble overhead, People with places to go and things to do Going and doing. I lie here almost dead, My lifeline shrunken to a little thread, For none believe me any more, not you, Your fathers, mothers, uncles, cousins, aunts, The damned literature, and you again: In broadest daylight I could make advance, Or step out on the riverbank and dance In perfect safety from the sun, I'm thin. I once comprised the darkest of /koans/ To be put down by students' utter thought, Or taught Gruff's Gambit to who had no plans For one lone life, leave off your many spans, And how to win at fights you never fought: I was the dark that had to die that you Could live in sunlight on the darkest night, That had to cease before you could accrue Your fathers' world, let all alone the new, A thing for solving by the acolyte. How you have learned to laugh at all the dark Things mind once dreamed, for having a "degree," But you have no more knowledge than a clerk: You fill in "purpose" from another's mark And call it "knowledge," that you but agree. Because real men have solved your /koans/ for you, Grown your food, made all your engines run, Blown /panzers/, flown the Blitz, and sunk the /Soryu/; You think they did it for that they adore you. Now you sit above the dead and poke your fun. But always at the back of neck are trolls, And we have learned machines as well as you; Now we no longer interrupt your strolls: We travel in the spaces of your Rolls And break you down in lonely places, too. And in those real dark nights of all your souls Is no one way by which to put a devil Off his little feeding on your goals: You live your lives by adding up paroles And roll which way your little worlds are bevel. I sit and laugh, for you will walk again When Daddy's world runs out, and you have none; For though I have grown lately rather thin, I never die, nor wonder where you've been: My appetite has only just begun. 65 The Difference The kittens pounce each other, teeth and claws So ready for the world, but held to play; The daggers are but halfway from the paws And softly set, so that they do not fray. But when it comes to furniture, they grow Vaster than emperors in a quarter sec, To rip the stuffing from the so-and-so To show it who's the boss, and what the heck. The curtains, too, are not safe from assault: They've left their hooks in all the newest crop Not near so much because of primal fault, But rather race each other to the top. But when they gut each other, not a shred Of fur is shed, nor let alone their blood, But when they get to playing on the bed They turn the bedroom in a single thud. And all the while, not one of them is hurt By all this mayhem to my little house; Their treatment of each other may be curt, But oh, boy, when at last they find a mouse! 66 172 (from /Thrace/) A swing, a miss, he struck ten million out. Nine million fumbled and the field was dry. A two-foot putt, eight million rolled on by. A seven-million free throw missed: no pout. For six cool mil, the white trunks lost the bout. A five-mil racquet stomped on by the guy. Four-mil endorsements for the butterfly. Three million just for finding by the scout. The Congress "voted" not to spend a mil On one new fighter plane (none thought them daft); Our stuff was always good enough, before. Our "downsized" Army's "good enough until." (Our gangs of "youths" are far too big to draft.) And, while we slept, our country went to war. 67 P.S. 31 Lord, let me open with a prayer Although it's not the way of you; But if I didn't folks would stare And throw stones, too. Deliver me from baby crap Whose only input is the itch And won't be woken from its nap Except to bitch. Now let my ear bow where the tone Delivers speedy recompense In holy silence, and the stone Be my defense: For the strong rock knows a voice That must be hearkened to be heard, And must be heard to know of choice: Give me its word. My enemies have feared to see Me walk about beneath the sky, And all my friends resented me And wondered why. Now I am dead and out of mind To those who will not hear the stone, And I must work to seek my kind And find my own, For there were teeth behind the smiles And underneath the cloak, a knife: My friends pretended at their trials To have my life. But I have trusted In the working of the law, Working to restore your rusted Living claw. I put my seconds in your hand From first I knew until the last: From those who rave about the land I will be fast If you are but the only one Exists throughout the ancient land, And make thy face to shine upon Thy servant's hand. Let me never be ashamed That I have trusted in the words Delivered while the woodland flamed In minor thirds, But let the stupid be ashamed Before their little flaming cease, And worms consume the autolamed, And we'll have peace, For they've the right to silence and, If they cannot too well afford it, Coroners will be assigned To well record it. Thy bounty is beyond all count To who obey your silent word: You multiply the least amount Like the sweet curd. Right in their midst your law confounds Our direst foe: we keep on pitching And draw your languages' sweet sounds Amid their bitching, For you speak in a thousand tongues The mind can grasp, and none is speech, And every one a million songs With not one screech, And love alone will translate this To those but willing to obey, To sharply kick or wholly kiss With all you say, And we will get our just deserts For being those who only hear But all your rockpile ever blurts To any ear. 68 Your Honor, District judges, tiny vents That pass the gas of parliaments Upon the town, Whose many victims seldom doubt It cleverness your infant pout- Ing turns to frown, At home you pouted, but you turned To campus, where your sucking learned To sneer and scoff us; How different now your days are spent! We wonder where the yellow went When you took office. But we don't envy you your job, Or that it turns you to a blob For Burgermeisters: You sit upon a little bench Amid the constant verbal stench From several /scheiáters/, With each one of them selling his, When not a single sentence is Within the law; The law, they seek to circumvent By making you set "precedent" On their hee-haw. And their hee-haw is only that: There is here no aristocrat Who owns the law Or owns the body politick, And so he cannot make it stick Outside his awe That any few can tell the rest What is illegal or is best For everyone, Just who gets to impose their bets, Who gets the office, and who gets To wear the gun. And, of course, who gets to sit Just sucking artificial teat While others pay, And, finally, that last poor SOB Who only works, and's only job Is to obey. It's fine by me if you'd be ruled; I'll say that it was how you're schooled, But that's by choice; And choice is fine for you, you see: /You/ live with it. You don't rule me With /your/ god's voice, And for the little friends you choose, You might as well go suck your booze As tell me "law," For I am not the least bit bound By something that another found Or thinks he saw. His servants are his problems, too; Don't think, because they honor you I also must; The Constitution quite forbade Assertions that the voters made An uppercrust, Or stood above the citizen Because the British /pukka gen/ Is a /Crown/ Court; The U.S. Court's a /servant/, dude, Whose only legal attitude Is to support Whatever law defendant states Until the man capitulates His errant biz, Obeying him upon his hide And never taking any side But only his. But you believe yourself "above," And at the instigation of Some men of "letters," Your phony "court," and all its cops Are busy siding with the slops Against their betters. It's "social" conduct, to be sure, Wholly natural, wholly pure, As God commanded, But is the manner of an ape, A wolf, a mutt with teeth agape, Not "underhanded." When pressed, you say the people want, And think that this is so avant The modern city Must slave itself to every need When most of them would never heed It out of pity. If all you think you do is count, Go home: I'll spend a like amount On ammunition, For I can count as well as you, And I am frightened, through and through, By abolition Of all defense against "the people," The encroachment of the steeple, /The Common Law/, The public claim upon my crate, And the explosion of the State That Franklin saw, And note that you will only help Every little mother's whelp Turn low-class snobbery, Despite its want of human skill Because it can impose its will, Into armed robbery. A civil service always hums By adding noughts to get its sums And its "authority," Asserting that the little folk May always carry out their joke On the "minority," Because you say they've equal "right" To everything they merely spite When they must make it, And help them have what they've not made, Not borrowed, earned, or ever paid Because you take it, As though agreement made a man The property of who began His little tot up, When every boy who makes a count Is simply owned in like amount, And simpler shot up: Your bullies "own" the citizen For what they want, how much, and when, Until they've sacked us; It's simplest to /obey/ their law, And /own/ their little social flaw For target practice. We only make a few atone, It won't be common, let alone The epidemic It is in these poor States today, For it is /learned/ by those who prey, And not systemic. As always, we must zip our woolies And take on all sublettered bullies Who say they're lawrr: I mean policemen of the State, Carefully nursed since they were eight For being rawer Than the boys who dared to think, And put their teachers on the blink By asking stuff, So when these boys were beaten up For having words beyond a pup, The little tough Was smiled upon for helping "teach" Put "discipline" within her reach Instead of knowledge. And so the bullies prospered and Went farther than they'd ever planned, Yea, unto college Upon a "football scholarship" Because the college had to nip Such knowledge, too. There really isn't any use For public school, but the excuse Will still accrue A list of bullies every year, The "Good Old Boys" we're all to fear For their fake winning -- Not the fight, but teacher's trial, That pats the little bully while He goes down grinning -- Who like to be the teacher's pet, Whose will to fight is always set And always hasty, But diligently will obey The least "authority" as they Find wholly tasty. And so the teachers plan their classes To kiss these fellas on their noses With all high praise; These courses are required by The doyens of the senior high For all our days, While art and science are "electives," Subject to the same invectives From these boys, Which means the jocks don't have to take 'em, Audit, cheat, or even fake 'em For their joys. It takes a certain kind of man To force his will, for his elan, On "property"; A boy who had his way at home And helps establish modern Rome Though few agree; A boy whose sense of being right Lies solely in another's fright, Which he can cause In nearly any living thing And so, to "rectitude," can bring Another's laws. Your Honor, you were only hired To keep this boy from his inspired Bullying, But now you tell him your desire Is all the law he can acquire For sullying: Precisely what the teacher said When he hit others in the head Or broke their noses, But giving /all/ his fellows right To plant the bastard out of sight Pushing up roses. Now, you command that bunch of boys Who threaten people with their toys So they'll obey A group of people /you/ call "right," Despite the fact their appetite Is to betray All parts of property and mind To those who simply cannot find Their little fuss. But "regular militia," sure Address their bosses as "yes, sir," /And that is us/. You'd hate to have my scrutiny Applied to every mutiny Your boys commit, So why not educate their "law" To say "yes, sir" to each they saw, Instead of "shit," For that is all that law requires Of every man who so desires To be the law: You rob a robber, kill a killer, Rape a rapist with a driller, But keep the claw Of taxes down to home defense; All else is private recompense For stuff we need, Like roads, for which we pay a toll Whenever we may wish to roll: It's chickenfeed, But built the Turnpikes, paid them off 'Til they were given to the toff, Who's in the red For social reasons, not for tax, If we were to examine facts With a clear head. And schools! In 1959, A New York jury did resign Our schools to brats By finding for a plaintiff child Whose teacher found him much too wild And warmed his slats. Since then, the worst have ruled the class, The playground, the "library" pass, Our every nerve, The newest suburb and the slum, And then the core curriculum, But first, The Curve. In every class there is a boy Who'd give the city greatest joy By being hung; Why do you keep your "law" so piled It gives exception to the "child" For being "young"? Just once is probably enough To teach these kids the righter stuff Than infant gangs; But you assert the child has rights To live his life by pressing fights And showing fangs. When all else fails, you blame the home That any errant child should roam Upon the town, But if we ever try to spank, We suddenly have you to thank, And your best frown: To keep a well-run living room Costs three years in a little room With no escape; You teach our children we're outclassed Until one day you lead them past The yellow tape. We understand, of course, that you And all your little boys in blue Must have some crooks To justify your constant hoya, Not to mention paranoia At public looks, So you get more police to try with, Because you simply can't get by with The ones you've shipped, But must you make so many crooks? Time was, we simply had no gooks, For they'd been whipped To "yes, sir," while they still were boys And played but with their own poor toys However few, But Ollie Holmes pronounced us fleeced And city councils, we're policed And under you. You claim to be exempt from force. It's time you took a little course, And learned your place: You, whose "law" so well belabors, Were only hired to keep our neighbors Out of our face. 69 TV Guide The calendar grows short, and I grow broody: The year is toward its end, and so am I. I think on all I know, and don't know why: Life /was/ too short to waste on /Howdy Doody/. I'm glad that I have seen the living sparks That were Spike Jones, Sid Caesar, and George Burns; But it is fall; the living season turns. Was life too short to waste on Groucho Marx? I never saw the Beav, and barely know The Rifleman, or Maverick, or Kermit; The want of /Dragnet/ didn't make a hermit: On NET, I watched an egg to grow. I watched /Sea Hunt/ for underwater life And /Sky King/ for the Beech 18, for I Was going to be an astronaut, or die. (I failed the flight exam, and took a wife: These verses, though I didn't know it yet.) Then Liberace moved me to piano, And I became more round, if not /mens sano/, A bit more popular, but didn't get A girl, like all the other Proper fellows: I didn't watch the things they talked about, Which left my social status in some doubt. It's still in doubt, amid these reds and yellows, For /Star Trek/ is my poison, and it's old; I do not sling the lingo of the tube, And, to my age, must add that I'm a cube, For modern "drama" only leaves me cold. Then add to all my other social torts The fact I've only /heard of/ Kirby Puckett, Fran Tarkenton, The Dream and how they stuck it, Because I don't watch live or broadcast sports. This leaves me with a social handicap Among the folks who never do, themselves, But count the trophies on another's shelves; Who never fight, but say they judge the scrap. As winter's in the clubhouse turn again, It asks me what I've bet my life on, if I know someone who's turned into a stiff Or put it where I'll still be living when The Bookmobile comes 'round ten decades on, And one lone person, soaking in my words Discards his fellows' juvenile absurds To build his houseboat, fly his small /baton/ With some small cupboard having me to thank, Continues with the being I began, And sets a raft upon his little span For when his cottage catches in the bank. 70 Moritake A small green heron on a naked branch: Japan has brought to art what she brought war. 71 A Conjugation "To love" is strong, and most irregular. "I love." What am I loving, but myself, Found haply in your giving your bazaar? "You love," and I am on a little shelf, Displayed to world as worthy of your love (You walking miles in snow to sit my lap Most naked, better than the Catholic dove To prove my grace, and not the least my hap). "She loves," and world is brighter than it was, For I am what she does, the all of me Being brighter with her world, and just because. "We love," and this is all there is of "we," A state that politics must try but fail, For politics must help itself our plate Where love is but to give, if only tail. And thus "you love" defines an empty state No voter will achieve by wanting it, No politician fill with promises, "They love" as empty as the suckled teat That's all they left of last year's darling Prez. There's no one loves but "I" and "I," that "we" Being found once in myself and once in what I choose or dare to love, a harmony Demands a purer note of scuttlebutt To shape itself upon the selfsame pitch, Chords, and progressions, 'til the flesh, So molded by the ancient joy or bitch, Picks up the ancient sword, its reflex fresh. 72 Election Tuesday Your Honor, give us now Barabbas, For he is nor so scary: His words do not jump out and grab us Beneath where we are hairy. That other's words seek but to stab us In everything we suck: So give us, please, the kind Barabbas To see our state and cluck, For never will you hear Barabbas Say, "poor, you'll always have"; The other always tries to blab us Things that do not salve. That man has never done but crab us And every God we whelp: Please give us now the great Barabbas Who does not need our help. Your Honor, give us, please, Barabbas Who knows just how we sup, And please, before the other nab us, String the bugger up. 73 Purpose The world keeps trying to spit us off With hurricane, with youth, with toff. We keep returning to the seat Where mind meets matter in the meat, And there we grow a little stronger That each trip last a little longer. 74 Holy Communion They talk of "frenzy" quite as if the shark Excused the same in men in equal dark. 75 Our Town So much of our city is streets Because we would barter our sweets. So many old trees are diseased For we planted the fastest we pleased. So many old cables are bare For the vermin have tasted eclair. So many new jails are packed, Where the criminals get what they "lacked." So much of our houses are locks For a man doesn't like his own socks. So many old asses are tight For they train the wrong dogs, and they bite. 76 Making Up Not grace, but the pronouncement of the grace Holds all our hearts: Not face, but the pronouncement of the face As separate parts. 77 Mystery Where at noon's the ambition of that list We made last night before we went to bed, And left to tell a mind that sleep had kissed What it could do on waking from the dead? The first half wasted looking for the trowel To primp a garden not yet overrun, Ignored the ancient spelling of a vowel Excused the student that he'd not begun. 78 Fire /Or/ Ice? Your irk can vote? I'd like you note You can kill grass As well as ass And nothing know But the snow. 79 Incident In Da Nang The day the four-year-old with the grenade Blew herself upon my once-best friend A place five kinds of racist all had made Unfit for any conscript you could send You wiped the counter right down to the end Where I sat with a slowly-warming Miller, Said, "What do you hear these days from the baby-killer?" 80 Dedication We build our houses of the stuff of plants And praise the daily business of the ants Who do all that they do so very well But only raise a pebble that it fell. But who is mocked, and who is it that mocks? At least the ants build out of little rocks. 81 Definition The marble is so smooth we call it beauty, But man is wrinkled by his sense of duty. 82 Fruit It is one thing to see Another person's Tree, Another thing to groan To grow your own, But if you do, each fruit Will suit. 83 Planning Commission The city lives as much as does a man, Organic, action and reaction, shit, Consumables, a spasm of art, a plan, With nothing but its kids to come of it. 84 Question Do we shoot rockets that a country rises On a pillar of its burning, bursts In scope and color that alone surprises, And then repeats because a people thirsts? Or is the only song we ever sang The fact that we could make a thing go bang? 85 Biology Film With Sterling Holloway to give relief From finding what mortality's about, The Moody Bible Institute denied belief Its flinging paint at canvas, not its doubt. 86 Bomb Shelter It holds in its cocoon All foodstuffs but the moon, And in its many books All of our former looks. Considering your gall, Why come up at all? 87 Justice Here on the prairie is no leaping tide, Though we are sure that we can feel the moon. Here where but the continent may ride Moon worries rock for nothing sometime soon. But as a lake is emptied by a spoon, The rocks fold under or explode to heights That someday may set certain crimes to rights. 88 Pastor The man who said it first knew more Than he allowed the words, So why will you the words adore, And let still less your herds? 89 Sample Some hundred made me better than I was; Some hundred others quite forbid the process. All of the rest shared my results because They found us "equal." Though never to my losses. 90 Strategy The wolf has learned to blow down any brick, But can't be every place the thatch lies thick. 91 Survival Socrates trained men. Plato taught students. This difference in gen Is still called prudence. 92 The Graduate They make you blame your data, that your mind, Despite your grades, is ever going blind, And carefully don't tell you of their clout: That "Garbage Resident" is "Garb